What do fathers want?

FATHER’S Day is this Sunday and the “Sweet and chocolaty message for fathers” in The Star the other day has prompted me to put on my thinking cap on what a father wants for his children, the generations to come, and the fathers themselves.

After being a father for close to two decades, it sets me to think for the first time what is treasured most in my life as a father. Children. They are more than apples of my life. They are God’s most precious gifts that have been entrusted to my care.

Every aspect of their development, such as their health, education, emotional and spiritual growth, brings great joy to me. A father’s responsibilities are burdensome but worthwhile and rewarding.

Among them, education tops the priorities and this includes enrolling one in Austin Heights Private and International School and another in Singapore Polytechnic.

The decisions, though incurring a huge financial commitment, become easier after deliberating on their strength and weaknesses in studies.

Discipline comes in whenever necessary for sparing the rod will spoil the brats to achieve academically. The endeavour to nurture them requires, other than discipline, love and care plus lots of patience.

During school breaks, they are pampered with a holiday, either locally or once in a blue moon, an overseas trip, to enrich their lives and at the same time strengthen the family bond.

Most fathers desire a peaceful and politically-stable country for the children to grow up.

Political stability is important to ensure sustained socio-economic growth which promises brighter job prospects for their children.

Some parents, like me, are in our early 50s and very soon, our generation will be over but to our children and the future generations, it is just the beginning.

So, it is all the more crucial for our young people to be brought up in a society that is conducive and harmonious.

The country should also be free from political bickering and in-fighting for these will distract the leaders who are mandated by the rakyat to prioritise the country’s development, which includes seeing through policies like the Economic Transformation Programme and Iskandar Malaysia to fulfil the high-income nation status and Vision 2020.

Many views have also been expressed by various stakeholders, especially the PAGE and lately, Datuk Seri Wong Chun Wai, to emphasise more on the English language, to enable our children to be competitive in this globalised world.

Mutual trust, neighbourhood security, transparency and efficiency in the delivery system and public accountability should prevail in a society that treasures meritocracy much more than ethnicity.

A desirable society values diversity in religion, custom and belief that are part and parcel of a multi-racial community. It is also a nation where the leaders lead by example and walk the talk of the 1Malaysia concept in their daily lives, and not only when the general election is around the corner.

The proverb “behind every successful man there is a woman” depicts the importance of a wife to the father and the children. Her role in a family is further highlighted in “home sweet home”, “home is where the heart is” and “the hands that cradle the cot rock the world”.

The father and children of such a home are the MOST blessed souls in the world when there is a wise and diplomatic wife at the household. Her words are soothing in times of weariness and refreshing when one wakes up on the wrong side of the bed.

They could turn to her for words of advice or for second opinions.

Fathers should be treated as the head of households and be allowed to call the final shot if a compromise is difficult to come by. This will set examples for the children to emulate when they have their own families one day.

As the Chinese proverb says, jia he wan shi xing, which literally means that when there is harmony at home, every aspect of our lives will prosper.

That is something that every father wishes to have for himself and family but has always been elusive.

New models after new models have been launched but are often beyond their reach.

The high taxes have put many fathers in the “day-dreaming” gear and hopefully, the 20%-30% reduction in prices over a period of five years as promised by the Government can be shortened to say, two years so that a teacher like me can start saving from now on and be in time to pursue my dream of owning the Toyota Altis to replace the 13-year-old faithful Toyota Unser before the retirement.

Cheers to all fellow fathers on this coming Father’s Day!

TING LIAN LEE Johor Baru

Success is a state of being

VERY often the benchmark of ­success is wealth. Everyone is judged by the external signs of wealth.

People pass ­disparaging remarks about those who are doing service or providing for others but are not wealthy and do not display the signs of wealth.

If people identify more with their external conditions or roles, they will inevitably feel inferior or superior to others and so lack self respect.

The ways in which society works often blinds an ­individual from realising his/her own ­self-worth. For example, society sometimes gives ­acknowledge-ment only to those who are wealthy or occupy a position of authority. In reality, every individual has the right to know that worth is inherent in every human ­being.

Self worth can help ­individuals avoid feelings of inferiority or superiority. The middle path is a dignified way of life.

Success is not a material thing. It is a state of being. We might call it contentment, ­happiness or even peace.

How do you define success? It is the completion of a task, another job well done, an exam passed, a promise kept, or a mountain climbed.

Whatever we believe success to be will have a profound ­influence on our lives.


Bridget Menezes is the author of Self-Empowerment and Spiritual Counsellor. Readers can email her at lifestyle.bridget@thesundaily.com.

China's space dream comes true humbly

Ten years after China sent its first man into low earth orbit, three astronauts operating the Shenzhou-10 spacecraft started a journey on a mission which seeks a permanent space station around 2020.



Chinese President Xi Jinping said at the launch site that the crew carry a "space dream" of the Chinese nation and represent the lofty aspirations of the Chinese people to explore space.

The dream, though also dreamt by the more frequent space travelers of Russia and American, includes a manned space station, moon exploration and even deep space odysseys.

The dream is a humble one. China was decades behind Russia and the United States in space technology.

But Chinese pursue it unswervingly in line with a carefully designed three-phase manned space program.

Two years after the space flight operated by China's first astronaut, Yang Liwei, two men, including Shenzhou-10 commander Nie Haisheng, orbited the earth in 2005. Then three more in 2008, two of whom finished China's first extra-vehicular activities (EVA).

After the unmanned Shenzhou-8 and Tiangong-1 space module docking in 2011 to test automated space docking, a key skill to assemble a space station, three Chinese astronauts succeeded in operating the docking manually in 2012.

The Shenzhou-10 mission, if successful, marks the end of the first half of the second phase, which means China has completely mastered EVA and space docking skills.

However, just as the female astronaut Wang Yaping said, "we are all students in facing the vast universe."
China's pursuit of its own space dream showcases a latecomer's unremitting interests and desire to learn about the universe.

During the 15-day Shenzhou-10 mission, Wang will hold a class in space educating a group of students from a high school in Beijing through satellite communication.

This in-orbit event, hopefully broadcast live, will inspire students and also spur citizen's space interests in a country with 1.3-billion people, making this an unparalleled popularization of science in human history.

Similar to other space giants, China's space program was carried out by astronauts selected from air force pilots and supported by military resources. But China has reaffirmed that it opposes militarization of the space and will utilize the space in a peaceful way.

After the year 2020, China's future space station will probably be the only one of any kind in service considering the ISS's retirement plan. By then, China's space dream will not only serve its own people but also contribute to space exploration for the human race.

By Xinhua writers Yan Hao, Meng Na and Li Huizi

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